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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063321156" data-attributes="member: 14320">Weekly Fishing TripA man was on the water for his weekly fishing trip.He began his day with an 8 pound bass on the first cast anda 7 pound on the second.On the third cast he had just caught his first ever bass over11 pounds when his cell phone rang. It was a doctor notifyinghim that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was incritical condition and in the ICU.The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he wasand that he'd be there as soon as possible.As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shapingup to be his best day ever on the water.He decided to get in acouple of more casts before heading to the hospital.He ended up fishing the rest of the morning, finishing histrip with a stringer like he'd never seen, with 3 bass over 10pounds. He was jubilant Then he remembered his wife.Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital.He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about hiswife's condition.The doctor glared at him and shouted,"You went aheadand finished your fishing trip didn't you! I hope you're proudof yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoyingyourself on the pond your wife has been languishing in the ICU!It's just as well you went ahead and finished because it will bemore than likely the last fishing trip you ever take! For the restof her life she will require 'round the clock care. Feeding her,bathing her, even wiping her ass. And you'll be her care giverforever!"The man was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed.The doctor then chuckled and said, "I'm just fuckin' with ya.She's dead. What'd you catch?"**********A man is lying in bed in the ICU with an oxygen mask overhis mouth. A young blonde student nurse appears to sponge hishands and feet."Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testiclesblack?"Embarrassed, the young girl replies, "I don't know, I'm onlyhere to wash your hands and feet."He struggles again to ask,"Nurse, are my testicles black?"Finally she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holdshis penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand andtakes a closer look and says,"They look very good to me,"after giving then her expert blonde scrutiny.Finally the mans pulls off his oxygen mask and replies,"That as very nice but, I asked ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK?"</blockquote>