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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063345273" data-attributes="member: 14320">Sperm CountThere was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant.So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told himto take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day.The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup wasempty and the lid was on it.Doctor: What was the problem?Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing.Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried.Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?!Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup.@@@The newlyweds are in their honeymoon room and the groom decides tolet the bride know where she stands right from the start of the marriage.He proceeds to take off his trousers and throw them at her.He says, "Put those on."The bride replies, "I can't wear your trousers."He replies, "And don't forget that! I will always wear the pants in the family!"The bride takes off her knickers and throws them at him with thesame request, "Try those on!"He replies,"I can't get into your knickers!""And you never bloody will if you don't change your attitude."@@@A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask andholding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open thesperm bank vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!","I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to thevault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says"Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him"BUT, they are sperm samples???" , "DO IT!".So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.",so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the mantakes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - its not that hard."</blockquote>

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