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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063440971" data-attributes="member: 14320">Martin went to a brothel and told the madam, "I want a girl with bigboobs and a small box." "Why?" she asked him. "Never mind!" repliedMartin."I'm paying for it. I want a girl with big tits and a small cooze!" "No problem," said the madam."Go straight up the stairs to room 23." A few minutes later there wasa knock on the door, and a young woman walked in."Okay," she said," are you the guy with the big mouth and the smalldick?"FFFFFA woman walked into the pharmacy and asked for a vibrator.The pharmacist gestured with his index finger and said, "Come this way."The woman replied, "If I could come that way, I wouldn't need a vibrator!"FFFFFOne morning a man came into the church on crutches.He stopped in front of the holy water, put some on both legs,and then threw away his crutches.An alter boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tellthe priest what he'd just seen."Son, you've just witnessed a miracle," the priest said."Tell me where is this man now?""Flat on his ass over by the holy water," said the boy.FFFFFHappiness is defined as opening your refrigerator to find yourmother-in-law's picture on the milk carton.Q. What did the doctor say to the nervous patient who was about to have acircumcision done?A. "It won't be long now....!!"Q: Why is a turd better than a woman?A: Because after you lay a turd you don't have to hug and kiss it.Q: Did you hear about the new deodorant called Umpire?A: It's for foul balls.Q: What tastes good on pie but not on pussy?A: Crust.Q: Did you hear about the fire in the rednecks library?A: Both the books got burned, and one hadn't even been colored in yet.Q: What's the first thing a women released from a battered women's shelter should do?A: The dishes, if she's smart.Q: What's worse than your best friend telling you that he's a faggot?A: When he tells you that he fucked you that night you passed out drunk on his couch!A Homosexual In A BarA homosexual went into a bar and met a big, burly man and they soonleft together. The next day the homosexual came back in the bar, allbattered and bruised, with two broken legs and his head bandaged. Thebartender asked, "What the hell happened to you?""Well," the homosexual replied, "that man I left with yesterday winedme and dined me, then took me up to his apartment and gave me a bath,powdered me down and put me in a beautiful negligee.Then he picked me up in his arms, carried me over to the window by themoonlight and asked me, 'Are you my little nightingale?'"I said yes, and he replied, 'Well, fly, you little fucker, fly!' andthrew me out the window!"======A very naive British sailor is in a bar in London. He meets a wildgirl, and she takes him upstairs. She takes off her pants and herpanties. He looks between her legs, and he says,"What's that?"She says, "It's me lower mouth."He says, "What do you mean, `your lower mouth'?"She says, "Just what I said, it's me lower mouth. It's got amustache...it's got lips..." He says, "'as it got a tongue in it?"She says, "Not always.======A very naive British sailor is in a bar in London. He meets a wildgirl, and she takes him upstairs. She takes off her pants and herpanties. He looks between her legs, and he says,"What's that?"She says, "It's me lower mouth."He says, "What do you mean, `your lower mouth'?"She says, "Just what I said, it's me lower mouth. It's got amustache...it's got lips..." He says, "'as it got a tongue in it?"She says, "Not always.======What does a 72-year-old snatch taste like?Depends...</blockquote>

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