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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063577026" data-attributes="member: 14320">Useless Penis FactsActual amount of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200Average # of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallonsAverage amount of water it takes to fill a bathtub: 35 gallonsAverage speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hourAverage speed of a city bus: 25 miles per hourAverage # of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7Average # of calories in a can of Dr. Pepper: 150Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inchesAverage length when erect: 5.1Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inchLargest natural penis recorded: 11 inchesLargest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet (blue whale)Height from court floor to the rim of a basketball hoop: 10 feetMost arousing time of day/season for a man: Early morning/fallBest ways to improve sexual function: quit smoking, start exercising, lose weightFoods that improve sex life: oysters, lean meat, seafood, whole grains, wheat germPercent of men who say they masturbate: 60%Percent of men who say they masturbate at least once a day: 54%Percent of men who say they feel guilty masturbating that often: 41%Amount of time needed for a man to regain erection: from 2 min to 2 weeksAverage # of erections per day for a man: 11Average # of erections during the night: 9Distance sperm travels to fertilize an egg: 3-4 inchesThe human equivalent: 26 miles (a marathon distance)Time it takes the sperm: 2.5 secondsTime it takes an average person to complete a marathon: 4 hoursSperm life: 2 1/2 months (from development to ejaculation)Shelf life of a Hostess Twinkie: 7 yearsCost of a year's supply of condoms: $100Thickness of the average condom: .07 mmThickness of super-thin condoms: .05 mmThickness of plastic wrap: .0127 mm# of times condoms are thicker that plastic wrap: Almost 6In general, the taste of a man's semen varies with his diet.Some say that the alkaline-based foods (fish and some meats) produce a buttery or fishy taste.Dairy products can create a foul taste; the taste of semen after eating asparagus is said to be the foulest.Acidic fruits and alcohol (except processed liquors) give it a pleasant and sugary taste. Examples: oranges, mangos, kiwi, lemons, grapefruit, limes, Labatt Blue, Honey Brown, etc. (drinking a Corona with lime is double the fun)Odors that increase blood flow to the penis: lavender, licorice, chocolate, doughnuts, pumpkin pie.Yes, the penis does shrink in the shower.It is common for men to wake up with 'morning wood,' a name for an a.m. erection.Blue balls, or the term a man uses when he says his balls will explode if he doesn't have sex, is totally false.=====Why is it good for young boys to read Playboy and Penthouse?It improves hand to eye coordination.=====What do you call a handcuffed man?Trustworthy.=====What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breathand calling your name?You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.====="I once wanted to become an atheist but I gave up. They have no holidays."</blockquote>

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