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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063727410" data-attributes="member: 14320">The WhorehouseThis guy goes into a whorehouse and tells the mistress he wants to eat out a girl for the first time. She sends him up and he meets this deadly blonde chick. She whips down her pants and he starts licking her twat. Minutes later he feels something in his mouth and spits out a corn niblet. Thinking this is normal, as he has never done it before continues eating her out. Minutes pass and he finds a piece of carrot in his mouth. Still thinking this is normal he continues. Soon after he finds a piece of meat and stands up. "Excuse me miss, but are you sick?" She looks at him and replies "No, but the last guy was!"************There once was a man named Ron RiceWhose privates were ravaged by liceHe scrubbed and he scratched,But still more were hatchedIf you've had it, you know it ain't nice.There was a man from CubaWho stuck his dick in a tubaHis newly wed brideBlew on the other sideAnd his dick flew off to Aruba************A guy's walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City and he runs into a hooker. He says, "How much?" She says "Twenty bucks." He says, "All right." They climb down under the boardwalk, and he bangs her. The next night, he runs into the same hooker, they go under the boardwalk, only this time while he's banging her, she blasts two incredible farts. When they get done, he hands her twenty-five dollars. She says, "What's the extra five?" He says, "That's for blowing the sand off my balls."************Q. What does Popeye do to keep his favorite tool from rusting?A. Sticks it in Olive Oyl.Q. What do you call a man who cries while he masturbates?A. A tearjerker.Q. What's the the definition of a vagina?A. The box a penis comes in.Q. What do you call twelve naked men sitting on each others shoulders?A. A scrotum pole! Did You Hear About The Blonde Who....1) had more on her body than on her mind?2) was called "Sanka" because she had no active ingredient in the bean?3) took an hour to cook Minute Rice?4) got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?5) was an M.D.: Mentally Deficient?6) had a terrific stairway, but nothing upstairs?7) thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?8) was told she was a silly puss, but insisted that she didn't have acrazy cat?9) after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get tallergirls?10) went to a nudist camp for a game of strip poker?11) brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?12) thought Moby Dick was a venereal disease?13) thought that a sanitary belt was a shot from a clean whiskey glass?14) thought that intercourse was a state highway?I like keeping an eye on the clockWhilst jacking my load in a sockBut my dear darling wifeCould save me this strifeIf only she'd suck on my cock</blockquote>