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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063768126" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Urinal Challenge</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Take the first annual, Choose-A-Urinal Challenge! Men should ace this test (or suffer the wrath of men everywhere)... women are on their own. But, there IS a code of the rest room that MUST be followed. The, following is the urinal configuration in a sample men's room. An X above the number will indicate "in use."</p><p></p><p>(Sample)</p><p>___________________________</p><p>|___ |____|_X__|___|__ |X | </p><p>|__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5__|_6_|</p><p></p><p>Indicates men are at stalls 3 and 6.</p><p></p><p>_______________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>Easy Section</p><p></p><p>1. Urinals 2 and 4 are occupied.</p><p>___________________________</p><p>|___|__X|___ |_X |___|__ | </p><p>|_1_|_2_ |_3_ |_4_|_5 |_6 |</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p></p><p>The correct answer is 6. It's the ONLY one to go to and every guy instinctively knows this.</p><p></p><p>_____________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>2. Urinal 1 is occupied.</p><p>___________________________</p><p>|_ X_|___|___|___|____|__ | </p><p>|__1_|_2 |_3_|_4_|_5__|_6 |</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p></p><p>The correct answer is 6. Stall 5 is acceptable, but you run a greater risk of being next to someone who arrives later.</p><p>_______________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>Kind of Tricky Section</p><p></p><p>3. No urinals are occupied.</p><p>___________________________</p><p>|___ |____|___|___|____|__ | </p><p>|__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5__|_6_|</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p>The correct answer is 1 or 6. By choosing one of these, you are tacitly saying, "I don't want anyone next to me."</p><p></p><p>____________________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>4. Urinals 2, 4 and 6 are occupied.</p><p>___________________________</p><p>|___ |__X |___|_X_|___|_X_| </p><p>|__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_|</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p>The correct answer is 1. You're stuck being next to at least ONE guy, so you minimize the impact and get a wall on your left. NEVER go between TWO guys if you can help it. Exceptions to this are stadium rest rooms where the herd thunders in.</p><p>_______________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>Subtle, Tricky, but Important to Know Section</p><p></p><p>5. Urinals 2, 5 and 6 are occupied.</p><p></p><p>___________________________</p><p>|___ |__X_|___|___|_X_|_X | </p><p>|__ 1_|__2_ |_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_|</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p>The correct answer is 4. Believe it or not, 1 or 3 "couples" you with the guy in stall 2. And we wouldn't want THAT now, would we? This differs from question 4 in such a subtle way that the nuances cannot be explained. Suffice it to say, only we men would understand!</p><p>_______________________________________________________</p><p></p><p>VERY Tricky Indeed Section</p><p></p><p>6. Urinals 1, 2, 5 and 6 are occupied.</p><p></p><p>___________________________</p><p>|__X |_ X_|___|___|_X_|_X | </p><p>|__1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_|</p><p></p><p>Enter your choice here: __</p><p></p><p>The answer is NONE! You go to the mirror and pretend to comb your hair or straighten a tie until the urinals "open up" a bit more. If you have to go REAL, REAL BAD, for God's sake, man, use a stall with a door!</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_______________________________________________________</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Other Parts of the Unwritten Code of the Urinals:</p><p></p><p>NO Talking, unless it's a good friend... but even then, keep it terse and unemotional. This ain't no clubhouse.</p><p></p><p>I don't think I need to tell you, but absolutely NO touching of anyone other than yourself. A touch of another's elbow is the highest offense.</p><p></p><p>NO Singing. Period.</p><p></p><p>Glances are for purposes of acknowledgment only..."Yeah, I see you there. I will not look again."</p><p></p><p>Who'd have thought SO much goes into a seemingly simple process? </p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal"> THE WORD FUCK!</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">( I just love this one )</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.</p><p></p><p>In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).</p><p></p><p>It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid). As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "fuck"..</p><p></p><p>Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations:</p><p></p><p>1. Greetings: How the fuck are ya?</p><p>2. Fraud: I got fucked by the car dealer.</p><p>3. Resignation: Oh, fuck it!</p><p>4. Trouble: I guess I'm fucked now.</p><p>5. Aggression: Fuck you!</p><p>6. Disgust: Fuck me.</p><p>7. Confusion: What the fuck.......?</p><p>8. Difficulty: I don't understand this fucking business!</p><p>9. Despair: Fucked again...</p><p>10. Pleasure: I fucking couldn't be happier.</p><p>11. Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here?</p><p>12. Lost: Where the fuck are we.</p><p>13. Disbelief: Unfuckingbeliveable!</p><p>14. Retaliation: Up your fucking ass!"</p><p>15. Denial: I didn't fucking do it."</p><p>16. Perplexity: I know fuck all about it."</p><p>17. Apathy: Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?</p><p>18. Suspicion: Who the fuck are you?</p><p>19. Panic: Let's get the fuck out of here.</p><p>20. Directions: Fuck off.</p><p>21. Disbelief: How the fuck did you do that?</p><p></p><p></p><p>It can be used in an anatomical description- He's a fucking asshole.</p><p>It can be used to tell time- It's five fucking thirty.</p><p>It can be used in business- How did I wind up with this fucking job?</p><p>It can be maternal- Motherfucker.</p><p>It can be political- Fuck George Bush!</p><p></p><p></p><p>It has also been used by many notable people throughout history:</p><p></p><p>What the fuck was that?</p><p>-Mayor of Hiroshima</p><p></p><p>Where did all these fucking Indians come from?</p><p>-General Custer</p><p></p><p>Where the fuck is all this water coming from?</p><p>-Captain of the Titanic</p><p></p><p>That's not a real fucking gun.</p><p>-John Len</p><p></p><p>Who's gonna fucking find out?</p><p>-Richard Nixon</p><p></p><p>Heads are going to fucking roll.</p><p>-Anne Boleyn</p><p></p><p>Let the fucking woman drive.</p><p>-Commander of Space Shuttle</p><p></p><p>What fucking map?</p><p>-Challenger, Mark Thatcher</p><p></p><p>Any fucking idiot could understand that.</p><p>-Albert Einstein</p><p></p><p>It does so fucking look like her!</p><p>-Picasso</p><p></p><p>How the fuck did you work that out?</p><p>-Pythagoras</p><p></p><p>-You want what on the fucking ceiling?</p><p>Michaelangelo</p><p></p><p>Fuck a duck.</p><p>-Walt Disney</p><p></p><p>Why?- Because its fucking there!</p><p>-Edmund Hilary</p><p></p><p>I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?</p><p>-Joan of Arc</p><p></p><p>Scattered fucking showers my ass.</p><p>-Noah</p><p></p><p>I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head.</p><p>-John F. Kennedy-</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1063768126, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Urinal Challenge[/COLOR][/B] Take the first annual, Choose-A-Urinal Challenge! Men should ace this test (or suffer the wrath of men everywhere)... women are on their own. But, there IS a code of the rest room that MUST be followed. The, following is the urinal configuration in a sample men's room. An X above the number will indicate "in use." (Sample) ___________________________ |___ |____|_X__|___|__ |X | |__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5__|_6_| Indicates men are at stalls 3 and 6. _______________________________________________________ Easy Section 1. Urinals 2 and 4 are occupied. ___________________________ |___|__X|___ |_X |___|__ | |_1_|_2_ |_3_ |_4_|_5 |_6 | Enter your choice here: __ The correct answer is 6. It's the ONLY one to go to and every guy instinctively knows this. _____________________________________________________ 2. Urinal 1 is occupied. ___________________________ |_ X_|___|___|___|____|__ | |__1_|_2 |_3_|_4_|_5__|_6 | Enter your choice here: __ The correct answer is 6. Stall 5 is acceptable, but you run a greater risk of being next to someone who arrives later. _______________________________________________________ Kind of Tricky Section 3. No urinals are occupied. ___________________________ |___ |____|___|___|____|__ | |__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5__|_6_| Enter your choice here: __ The correct answer is 1 or 6. By choosing one of these, you are tacitly saying, "I don't want anyone next to me." ____________________________________________________________ 4. Urinals 2, 4 and 6 are occupied. ___________________________ |___ |__X |___|_X_|___|_X_| |__ 1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_| Enter your choice here: __ The correct answer is 1. You're stuck being next to at least ONE guy, so you minimize the impact and get a wall on your left. NEVER go between TWO guys if you can help it. Exceptions to this are stadium rest rooms where the herd thunders in. _______________________________________________________ Subtle, Tricky, but Important to Know Section 5. Urinals 2, 5 and 6 are occupied. ___________________________ |___ |__X_|___|___|_X_|_X | |__ 1_|__2_ |_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_| Enter your choice here: __ The correct answer is 4. Believe it or not, 1 or 3 "couples" you with the guy in stall 2. And we wouldn't want THAT now, would we? This differs from question 4 in such a subtle way that the nuances cannot be explained. Suffice it to say, only we men would understand! _______________________________________________________ VERY Tricky Indeed Section 6. Urinals 1, 2, 5 and 6 are occupied. ___________________________ |__X |_ X_|___|___|_X_|_X | |__1_|__2_|_3_|_4_|_5_ |_6_| Enter your choice here: __ The answer is NONE! You go to the mirror and pretend to comb your hair or straighten a tie until the urinals "open up" a bit more. If you have to go REAL, REAL BAD, for God's sake, man, use a stall with a door! [B][COLOR="Red"]_______________________________________________________[/COLOR][/B] Other Parts of the Unwritten Code of the Urinals: NO Talking, unless it's a good friend... but even then, keep it terse and unemotional. This ain't no clubhouse. I don't think I need to tell you, but absolutely NO touching of anyone other than yourself. A touch of another's elbow is the highest offense. NO Singing. Period. Glances are for purposes of acknowledgment only..."Yeah, I see you there. I will not look again." Who'd have thought SO much goes into a seemingly simple process? [B][COLOR="Teal"] THE WORD FUCK! ( I just love this one )[/COLOR][/B] Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate. In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck). It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid). As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "fuck".. Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations: 1. Greetings: How the fuck are ya? 2. Fraud: I got fucked by the car dealer. 3. Resignation: Oh, fuck it! 4. Trouble: I guess I'm fucked now. 5. Aggression: Fuck you! 6. Disgust: Fuck me. 7. Confusion: What the fuck.......? 8. Difficulty: I don't understand this fucking business! 9. Despair: Fucked again... 10. Pleasure: I fucking couldn't be happier. 11. Displeasure: What the fuck is going on here? 12. Lost: Where the fuck are we. 13. Disbelief: Unfuckingbeliveable! 14. Retaliation: Up your fucking ass!" 15. Denial: I didn't fucking do it." 16. Perplexity: I know fuck all about it." 17. Apathy: Who really gives a fuck, anyhow? 18. Suspicion: Who the fuck are you? 19. Panic: Let's get the fuck out of here. 20. Directions: Fuck off. 21. Disbelief: How the fuck did you do that? It can be used in an anatomical description- He's a fucking asshole. It can be used to tell time- It's five fucking thirty. It can be used in business- How did I wind up with this fucking job? It can be maternal- Motherfucker. It can be political- Fuck George Bush! It has also been used by many notable people throughout history: What the fuck was that? -Mayor of Hiroshima Where did all these fucking Indians come from? -General Custer Where the fuck is all this water coming from? -Captain of the Titanic That's not a real fucking gun. -John Len Who's gonna fucking find out? -Richard Nixon Heads are going to fucking roll. -Anne Boleyn Let the fucking woman drive. -Commander of Space Shuttle What fucking map? -Challenger, Mark Thatcher Any fucking idiot could understand that. -Albert Einstein It does so fucking look like her! -Picasso How the fuck did you work that out? -Pythagoras -You want what on the fucking ceiling? Michaelangelo Fuck a duck. -Walt Disney Why?- Because its fucking there! -Edmund Hilary I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain? -Joan of Arc Scattered fucking showers my ass. -Noah I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head. -John F. Kennedy- [/QUOTE]
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