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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063786868" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs</span></strong></p><p></p><p>One day the seven dwarfs were coming home after a hard days work. As</p><p>they approach the house, they hear some sounds coming from the garden.</p><p>Their curiousity aroused, they stand on each others shoulders until</p><p>finally one of them can see over the garden wall. The dwarf at the top,</p><p>sees snowwhite and the prince sitting and talking in the garden. He says</p><p>to the dwarf who`s shoulder he is standing on, "Snow White is with the</p><p>Prince"</p><p>This in turn gets passed down, dwarf to dwarf, "Snow White is with the</p><p>Prince"</p><p>"Snow White is with the Prince"</p><p>"Snow White is with the Prince"</p><p>"Snow White is....." (and so on) until it has reached all the</p><p>dwarfs.</p><p>Then the dwarf at the top says:</p><p>"They`re Kissing"</p><p>Again the chain starts:</p><p>"They`re Kissing"</p><p>"They`re Kissing"</p><p>"They`re Kissing"</p><p>"They`re ......."</p><p>"He`s taking off her clothes"</p><p>"He`s taking off her clothes"</p><p>"He`s taking off her clothes"</p><p>"He`s taking off............"</p><p>"They`re both nude now"</p><p>"They`re both nude now"</p><p>"They`re both nude now"</p><p>"They`re both........."</p><p>"He`s about to enter her"</p><p>"He`s about to enter her"</p><p>"He`s about to enter her"</p><p>"He`s about to.........."</p><p>At this point Snow White hears a sound near the wall, and so she gets up</p><p>to investigate.</p><p>The dwarf at the top sees this and says: "She`s Coming"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p>"So am I"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">@@@</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Once upon a time, there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a famous movie actor. Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do push ups and somersaults and limber himself up all the time, while the other sperm just lazed around doing nothing. One day, one of the sperm questioned Stanley and asked why he exercised all day.</p><p></p><p>Stanley explained, "Look pal, only one sperm gets a woman pregnant, and when the right time comes, I'm gonna be that one sperm!"</p><p></p><p>A few days later, all the sperm could feel themselves getting hotter and hotter. They knew the big swim was imminent. Moments later, they were released abruptly and, sure enough, Stanley was swimming far ahead of all the others.</p><p></p><p>Suddenly, Stanley stopped in his tracks, turned around, and began to swim back with all his might. "Go back! Go back!" he hollered, "It's a blow job!" </p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">On A Country Farm</span></strong></p><p></p><p>On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their three</p><p>sons.</p><p>Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking out of the</p><p>window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's only cow was lying</p><p>dead in the field.</p><p>The situation looked hopeless to her -- how could she</p><p>possibly continue to feed her family now?</p><p>In a depressed state of mind,</p><p>she hung herself.</p><p>When the man awoke to find his wife dead, as well as</p><p>the cow, he too began to see the hopelessness of the situation, and he</p><p>shot himself in the head.</p><p></p><p>Now the oldest son woke up to discover his</p><p>parents dead (and the cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and</p><p>drown himself.</p><p>When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting</p><p>on the bank. She said, "I've seen all and know the reason for your</p><p>despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I will</p><p>restore your parents and the cow to you."</p><p>The son agreed to try, but</p><p>after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy her again. So the</p><p>mermaid drowned him in the river.</p><p></p><p>Next the second oldest son woke up.</p><p>After discovering what had happened, he too decided to throw himself</p><p>into the river.</p><p>The mermaid said to him, "If you will have sex with me</p><p>ten times in a row, I will make everything right."</p><p>And while the son</p><p>tried his best (seven times!), it was not enough to satisfy the mermaid,</p><p>so she drowned him in the river.</p><p></p><p>The youngest son woke up and saw his</p><p>parents dead, the dead cow in the field, and his brothers gone. He</p><p>decided that life was a hopeless prospect, and he went down to the river</p><p>to throw himself in.</p><p>And there he also met the mermaid.</p><p>"I have seen all that has happened, and I can make everything right if</p><p>you will only have sex with me fifteen times in a row."</p><p>The young son</p><p>replied, "Is that all? Why not twenty times in a row?"</p><p>The mermaid was</p><p>somewhat taken aback by this request.</p><p>Then he said, "Hell, why not</p><p>twenty-five times in a row?"</p><p>And even as she was reluctantly agreeing to</p><p>his request,</p><p>he said, "Why not THIRTY times in a row?"</p><p>Finally, she</p><p>said, "Enough!! Okay, if you will have sex with me thirty times in a</p><p>row, then I will bring everybody back to perfect health."</p><p>Then the young</p><p>son asked, "Wait! How do I know that thirty times in a row won't kill</p><p>you like it did the cow?"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">=====</span></strong></p><p></p><p>That bastard husband of mine wanted me to sleep with the landlord</p><p>because he lost the rent money playing poker," the housewife told a</p><p>neighbor.</p><p>"You didn't do it, did you?"</p><p>"I have to admit I did -- though with certain misgivings, I might add.</p><p>What I haven't done, though, is tell my husband the rent is paid up for</p><p>six months!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">=====</span></strong></p><p></p><p>It had taken him several months, but the exec had finally persuaded his</p><p>new secretary to bend over the back of his leather couch and allow him</p><p>to have sex with her that way.</p><p>"And just where have you been until this hour?" demanded his wife, when</p><p>the wayward husband finally arrived home. "Down at the office," he</p><p>replied, "working like a dog."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1063786868, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs[/COLOR][/B] One day the seven dwarfs were coming home after a hard days work. As they approach the house, they hear some sounds coming from the garden. Their curiousity aroused, they stand on each others shoulders until finally one of them can see over the garden wall. The dwarf at the top, sees snowwhite and the prince sitting and talking in the garden. He says to the dwarf who`s shoulder he is standing on, "Snow White is with the Prince" This in turn gets passed down, dwarf to dwarf, "Snow White is with the Prince" "Snow White is with the Prince" "Snow White is with the Prince" "Snow White is....." (and so on) until it has reached all the dwarfs. Then the dwarf at the top says: "They`re Kissing" Again the chain starts: "They`re Kissing" "They`re Kissing" "They`re Kissing" "They`re ......." "He`s taking off her clothes" "He`s taking off her clothes" "He`s taking off her clothes" "He`s taking off............" "They`re both nude now" "They`re both nude now" "They`re both nude now" "They`re both........." "He`s about to enter her" "He`s about to enter her" "He`s about to enter her" "He`s about to.........." At this point Snow White hears a sound near the wall, and so she gets up to investigate. The dwarf at the top sees this and says: "She`s Coming" "So am I" "So am I" "So am I" "So am I" "So am I" "So am I" [B][COLOR="Red"]@@@[/COLOR][/B] Once upon a time, there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a famous movie actor. Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do push ups and somersaults and limber himself up all the time, while the other sperm just lazed around doing nothing. One day, one of the sperm questioned Stanley and asked why he exercised all day. Stanley explained, "Look pal, only one sperm gets a woman pregnant, and when the right time comes, I'm gonna be that one sperm!" A few days later, all the sperm could feel themselves getting hotter and hotter. They knew the big swim was imminent. Moments later, they were released abruptly and, sure enough, Stanley was swimming far ahead of all the others. Suddenly, Stanley stopped in his tracks, turned around, and began to swim back with all his might. "Go back! Go back!" he hollered, "It's a blow job!" [B][COLOR="Teal"]On A Country Farm[/COLOR][/B] On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their three sons. Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking out of the window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's only cow was lying dead in the field. The situation looked hopeless to her -- how could she possibly continue to feed her family now? In a depressed state of mind, she hung herself. When the man awoke to find his wife dead, as well as the cow, he too began to see the hopelessness of the situation, and he shot himself in the head. Now the oldest son woke up to discover his parents dead (and the cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and drown himself. When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting on the bank. She said, "I've seen all and know the reason for your despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I will restore your parents and the cow to you." The son agreed to try, but after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy her again. So the mermaid drowned him in the river. Next the second oldest son woke up. After discovering what had happened, he too decided to throw himself into the river. The mermaid said to him, "If you will have sex with me ten times in a row, I will make everything right." And while the son tried his best (seven times!), it was not enough to satisfy the mermaid, so she drowned him in the river. The youngest son woke up and saw his parents dead, the dead cow in the field, and his brothers gone. He decided that life was a hopeless prospect, and he went down to the river to throw himself in. And there he also met the mermaid. "I have seen all that has happened, and I can make everything right if you will only have sex with me fifteen times in a row." The young son replied, "Is that all? Why not twenty times in a row?" The mermaid was somewhat taken aback by this request. Then he said, "Hell, why not twenty-five times in a row?" And even as she was reluctantly agreeing to his request, he said, "Why not THIRTY times in a row?" Finally, she said, "Enough!! Okay, if you will have sex with me thirty times in a row, then I will bring everybody back to perfect health." Then the young son asked, "Wait! How do I know that thirty times in a row won't kill you like it did the cow?" [B][COLOR="Red"]=====[/COLOR][/B] That bastard husband of mine wanted me to sleep with the landlord because he lost the rent money playing poker," the housewife told a neighbor. "You didn't do it, did you?" "I have to admit I did -- though with certain misgivings, I might add. What I haven't done, though, is tell my husband the rent is paid up for six months!" [B][COLOR="Red"]=====[/COLOR][/B] It had taken him several months, but the exec had finally persuaded his new secretary to bend over the back of his leather couch and allow him to have sex with her that way. "And just where have you been until this hour?" demanded his wife, when the wayward husband finally arrived home. "Down at the office," he replied, "working like a dog." [/QUOTE]
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