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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063799310" data-attributes="member: 14320">Doc RourkeDoc Rourke rented an apartment in New York, and went to the lobbyto put his name on the group mailbox. While he was there, an attractiveyoung lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes, wearing arobe.Doc smiled at the young girl and she struck up a conversation withhim. As they talked, her robe slipped open. It was quite obviousthat she had nothing on under the robe. Poor Doc broke into a sweattrying to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, she placed herhand on his arm and said, "Let's go in my apartment, I hear someonecoming..."They proceeded into the apartment, and after she closed the door,she leaned against it allowing her robe to fall completely open.Shepurred at him, "What would you say is my best feature?"The flustered, embarrassed Doc stammered, cleared his throatseveral times, and finally squeaked out, "Oh, it's got to be yourears!"She was astounded! "Why my ears? Look at these boobs! They arefull, don't sag, and they're all mine! My butt - it's firm doesn'tsag, and has no cellulite! Look at this skin, no blemishes, or scars!Why in heaven's name would you say my ears are the best part of mybody?"Clearing his throat once again, Doc stammered - "Outside when yousaid you heard someone coming - THAT WAS ME!"'''''Q: What do you call a woman with a toothpick through her clit?A: Olive.Q: What did the male vampire say to his female teacher?A: "See you next period."Q: Why can't girls wear miniskirts in the winter?A: Chapped lips.Q: Did you hear about the one-legged girl who got raped?A: She couldn't cross her legs to save her ass.Q: How can you tell if a leper has been using your shower?A: Your bar of soap has gotten bigger.Q: What caused the leper go blind playing baseball?A: He kept his eye on the ball.Q: What does a woman have in common with a Kentucky Fried Chicken?A: When you're finished with the thigh and breast, you've still got agreasy box to stick your bone in.Q: What are the three reasons a bestialist prefers sheep over people?1. They never have a headache.2. They are always in the mood.3. When you finish fucking them, you can eat them.A surgeon came to see his patient on the morning after her operation.The young blonde asked him, somewhat hesitantly, how long it would be beforeshe could resume her normally active sex life."I really haven't thought about it," gulped the stunned surgeon."You're the first patient who's ever asked me that question aftera tonsillectomy!"________Morris was screwing his best friend's wife when hesuddenly stopped and sat on the edge of the bed,holding his head in his hands."What the hell is your problem?" the lady asked."I feel like a regular son of a bitch, getting mybest friend's pussy," the man moaned.The lady reached over and patted him on the back."Well, if that's all it is, you can stop worrying,"she said. You're not getting his pussy...."His pussy is three to four inches deeper."________A lad comes home from school and says "Dad, what’s a cunt", his Dad slaps him and tells him not to be so rude, the lad begs him as his mates are all taking the piss for not knowing.Feeling sorry for him the dad looks down and says "Follow me son"They walk into the bathroom where the wife is in the bath, "You see that black hairy thing in between your mothers legs son?""Well the rest of her’s a cunt"________My neighbours, the two 25 year old blonde lesbians next door, asked me what I would like for my birthday. I was quite surprised when they gave me a new Rolex.It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."________A lesbian goes to a nutritionist because she has indigestion.The nutritionist says "It’s simple - you are what you eat".so the lesbian turns to her and says..."Are you calling me a cunt?"________A gynecologist examines a lesbian and remarked "Madam that is the cleanest vagina I have ever seen"She replied "Thank you, I have a woman in twice a week !"</blockquote>

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