Menu
Home
Post Something
Forums
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
News & Features
The Marketplace
Cars for Sale
Engine and Performance
Chassis and Wheels
Exterior and Body
Interior and Cockpit
ICE - In Car Entertainment
Car Shops and Services
Toys and Wares
All Other Stuff
Jobs and Vacancies
Looking For
Members
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Reply to thread
See what others are reading now! Try Forums >
Current Activity
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Message
<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064122465" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Confession</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A sixteen year old virgin girl goes to confession.</p><p>"Father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch yesterday."</p><p>"Why did you call him a son-of-a-bitch??" the priest asked.</p><p>"Because, father, he touched me on my arm without permission"</p><p>"Do you mean like this??" He touches her arm.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason for calling him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father he also touched my breasts."</p><p>"You mean like this??" He touches her breasts.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father, he took off my clothes."</p><p>"Like this??" He takes off her clothes.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father he then put his you-know-what in my you-know-where."</p><p>"Like this??" He put his you-know-what in her you-know-where.</p><p>"Yes father," she says sometime later.</p><p>"But that's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father, he has AIDS."</p><p>"THAT SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!"</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">__________</span></strong></p><p></p><p>John and Jill were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door,</p><p>Jill said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door."</p><p>John says, "Well, give me some examples."</p><p>Jill proceeds to tell him, "Well, the first way is,</p><p>if a guy shoves his key in the lock, and opens the door hard,</p><p>then that means he is a rough lover and that isn't for me.</p><p></p><p>"The second way is if a man fumbles around and can't seem to find the hole,</p><p>then that means he is inexperienced and that isn't for me either."</p><p></p><p>Then Jill said, "Honey, how do you unlock your door?"</p><p>John proceeds to say, "Well, first before I do anything else,</p><p>I lick the lock."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Being Kinky</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A gentleman walks into the bar and takes his seat.</p><p>As the bartender serves him a Scotch, he notices</p><p>A Solid ten at the other end of the bar.</p><p>Motioning the barkeep he says get the young lady</p><p>Whatever she would like. He serves her up, she</p><p>Nods her approval and motions for our hero to join her.</p><p>They exchange pleasantries and soon discover they</p><p>Are both recently divorced and quite lonely.</p><p>Deciding to press on the young man explains that</p><p>His divorce came as a result of his total</p><p>Preoccupation with kinky sex.</p><p>At this admission our heroine's eyes light up</p><p>And she exclaims what a wonderful coincidence</p><p>Is occurring because that is exactly the reason</p><p>Her husband had left her.</p><p>She demurely whispers, " Let's drink up and go</p><p>To my place around the corner to explore our mutual desires.</p><p>He takes a last gulp, not believing his incredible</p><p>Fortune, and says "Lead on!!"</p><p>Arriving at her loft she purrs " Make yourself at home</p><p>While I change into something more playful"</p><p>She disappears into the bedroom and in five minutes</p><p>Reappears in only a Black leather teddy, eight inch</p><p>Red stiletto pumps and wielding a Cat 'O' Nine tails.</p><p>Just in time to find His nibs reaching for the front door!!!</p><p>"My Goodness", she exclaims, "I thought you loved Kinky Sex!</p><p>What's the matter? "</p><p>" Nothing." he groans, " I just screwed your poodle</p><p>And shit on your couch!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸, *¤º°`°º¤* ,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*</span></strong></p><p></p><p>She said, "Give me eight inches and make me bleed!" So I fucked her four times with my 2 inch dick and punched her on the nose! Later she said, "Give me eight inches and make me moan!" So I fucked her four more times with my 2 inch dick and kicked her in the stomach! Later she said, "Give me eight inches and make my head explode!" So I fucked her four more times with my 2 inch dick and blew her fucking head off with a shotgun!</p><p>She didn't ask me for sex after that, but it's a lot better now!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064122465, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Confession[/COLOR][/B] A sixteen year old virgin girl goes to confession. "Father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch yesterday." "Why did you call him a son-of-a-bitch??" the priest asked. "Because, father, he touched me on my arm without permission" "Do you mean like this??" He touches her arm. "Yes father." "That's no reason for calling him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father he also touched my breasts." "You mean like this??" He touches her breasts. "Yes father." "That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father, he took off my clothes." "Like this??" He takes off her clothes. "Yes father." "That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father he then put his you-know-what in my you-know-where." "Like this??" He put his you-know-what in her you-know-where. "Yes father," she says sometime later. "But that's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father, he has AIDS." "THAT SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!" [B][COLOR="Red"]__________[/COLOR][/B] John and Jill were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door, Jill said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door." John says, "Well, give me some examples." Jill proceeds to tell him, "Well, the first way is, if a guy shoves his key in the lock, and opens the door hard, then that means he is a rough lover and that isn't for me. "The second way is if a man fumbles around and can't seem to find the hole, then that means he is inexperienced and that isn't for me either." Then Jill said, "Honey, how do you unlock your door?" John proceeds to say, "Well, first before I do anything else, I lick the lock." [B][COLOR="Teal"]Being Kinky[/COLOR][/B] A gentleman walks into the bar and takes his seat. As the bartender serves him a Scotch, he notices A Solid ten at the other end of the bar. Motioning the barkeep he says get the young lady Whatever she would like. He serves her up, she Nods her approval and motions for our hero to join her. They exchange pleasantries and soon discover they Are both recently divorced and quite lonely. Deciding to press on the young man explains that His divorce came as a result of his total Preoccupation with kinky sex. At this admission our heroine's eyes light up And she exclaims what a wonderful coincidence Is occurring because that is exactly the reason Her husband had left her. She demurely whispers, " Let's drink up and go To my place around the corner to explore our mutual desires. He takes a last gulp, not believing his incredible Fortune, and says "Lead on!!" Arriving at her loft she purrs " Make yourself at home While I change into something more playful" She disappears into the bedroom and in five minutes Reappears in only a Black leather teddy, eight inch Red stiletto pumps and wielding a Cat 'O' Nine tails. Just in time to find His nibs reaching for the front door!!! "My Goodness", she exclaims, "I thought you loved Kinky Sex! What's the matter? " " Nothing." he groans, " I just screwed your poodle And shit on your couch!" [B][COLOR="Red"]*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸, *¤º°`°º¤* ,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*,¸¸,*¤º°`°º¤*[/COLOR][/B] She said, "Give me eight inches and make me bleed!" So I fucked her four times with my 2 inch dick and punched her on the nose! Later she said, "Give me eight inches and make me moan!" So I fucked her four more times with my 2 inch dick and kicked her in the stomach! Later she said, "Give me eight inches and make my head explode!" So I fucked her four more times with my 2 inch dick and blew her fucking head off with a shotgun! She didn't ask me for sex after that, but it's a lot better now! [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
The Marketplace Latest
original rare Rays Volk Racing ZE40 17x9jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
original rare Rays Volk Racing INGS TS06 18x8jj...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
New original Defi Advance A1 NA package triple...
Started by
david tao
Engine and Performance
original rare Rays Volk Racing CE28 16x7jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
Honda Jazz/Fit JSracing GTwing Spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Toyota Vios NCP93 front bonnet hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Honda civic fc varis spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 Msport front bumper set
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3/GTS front bonnet hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 vorsteiner rear bumper diffuser
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Posts refresh every 5 minutes
Buying an R33 Sedan
Dear sifus,
My cousin study in Japan and plans to return home by this June. Last year he purchased a R33 skyline sedan with a RB20E turbo. He insisted to bring over here in Malaysia. The question is;
1) Is the...
Looking for 350z diffuser
View attachment 663432
View attachment 663433
Do you guys know where can I find this diffuser?
Evo 4 gearbox and Evo 6 gearbox
just to ask is there any diff for evo4 and evo6 gearbox?
Recent Posts
Darker Design : Mercedes-Benz Launches GLA Nightfall Edition in Malaysia
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Honda Malaysia Doubles Down on Hybrids: New CR-V Launches with Dual e:HEV...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
BateriHub Reaches 200-Store Milestone, Becomes Malaysia’s Largest...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Been stalking for 3 years edy
Started by
dheepadarshan95
Introduction and Newbies
Recommendation: Turbocharger for 4B11 N.A engine
Started by
Mitevo7
Car Modification
Search
Online now
Enjoying Zerotohundred?
Log-in
for an ad-less experience
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
