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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064153381" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Bull Service</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A rancher needs a bull to service his cows but needs to borrow the money</p><p>from the bank. The banker who lent the money comes by a week later to</p><p>see how his investment is doing. The farmer complains that the bull just</p><p>eats grass and wont even look at the cows. The banker suggests that a</p><p>veterinarian have a look at the bull.</p><p>The next week the banker returns to see if the vet helped. The farmer</p><p>looks very pleased: "The bull has serviced all my cows, broke through</p><p>the fence, and has serviced all my neighbor's cows.". "Wow," says the</p><p>banker, "what did the vet do to that bull?". "Just gave him some pills,"</p><p>replied the farmer. "What kind of pills?" asked the banker.</p><p>"I don't know," says the farmer, "but they sort of taste like</p><p>peppermint."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">-----------------------------------------------</span></strong></p><p>A young man, with a promising career ahead of him, decided to marry a</p><p>respectable convent girl, untarnished with the sins of contemporary</p><p>society.</p><p>After the wedding service, the bridal couple had to drive through the</p><p>more unsavory areas of the city on the way to the reception. "William,</p><p>what are those women doing leaning against lampposts?" "Oh, those are</p><p>just tarts who hire their bodies out for sex at fifty dollars a time."</p><p>"Wow, fifty dollars!" exclaimed the bride, "the monks only used to give</p><p>us an apple!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Anniversary</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night</p><p>the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little</p><p>negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and</p><p>says, "Honey, Do you remember this?"</p><p>He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same</p><p>negligee the night we were married."</p><p>She says, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that</p><p>night."</p><p>He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember."</p><p>"Well, what was it?" she asks.</p><p>He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I'm</p><p>going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out."</p><p>She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that's it. That's exactly what you</p><p>said. So, now it's 50 years later, I'm in the same negligee I wore that</p><p>night. What do you have to say tonight?"</p><p>Again he looks up at her and looks her up and down and replies, "Mission</p><p>Accomplished."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">----------------------------------------------------</span></strong></p><p>A guy goes into a bar and notices a gorgeous young woman in the tightest</p><p>pants he's ever seen.</p><p>The guy can't help asking, "How does a person get into those pants?</p><p>She smiles. "Well, you could offer to buy me a drink first".</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064153381, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Bull Service[/COLOR][/B] A rancher needs a bull to service his cows but needs to borrow the money from the bank. The banker who lent the money comes by a week later to see how his investment is doing. The farmer complains that the bull just eats grass and wont even look at the cows. The banker suggests that a veterinarian have a look at the bull. The next week the banker returns to see if the vet helped. The farmer looks very pleased: "The bull has serviced all my cows, broke through the fence, and has serviced all my neighbor's cows.". "Wow," says the banker, "what did the vet do to that bull?". "Just gave him some pills," replied the farmer. "What kind of pills?" asked the banker. "I don't know," says the farmer, "but they sort of taste like peppermint." [B][COLOR="Red"]-----------------------------------------------[/COLOR][/B] A young man, with a promising career ahead of him, decided to marry a respectable convent girl, untarnished with the sins of contemporary society. After the wedding service, the bridal couple had to drive through the more unsavory areas of the city on the way to the reception. "William, what are those women doing leaning against lampposts?" "Oh, those are just tarts who hire their bodies out for sex at fifty dollars a time." "Wow, fifty dollars!" exclaimed the bride, "the monks only used to give us an apple!" [B][COLOR="Teal"]Anniversary[/COLOR][/B] A husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey, Do you remember this?" He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married." She says, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that night." He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember." "Well, what was it?" she asks. He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out." She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that's it. That's exactly what you said. So, now it's 50 years later, I'm in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?" Again he looks up at her and looks her up and down and replies, "Mission Accomplished." [B][COLOR="Red"]----------------------------------------------------[/COLOR][/B] A guy goes into a bar and notices a gorgeous young woman in the tightest pants he's ever seen. The guy can't help asking, "How does a person get into those pants? She smiles. "Well, you could offer to buy me a drink first". [/QUOTE]
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