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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064207582" data-attributes="member: 14320">A Dwarf LadyA little dwarf lady goes into her doctor's office complaining ofan irritated crotch. After an examination the doctor sighs,"I don't seem to see any problem. Does it get better or worse atany time?""Yeah, its really bad whenever it rains." she replies."Well, then," says the Doc, "Next time it rains, get in here atonce, and we'll take another look at it."Two weeks later it's raining really hard, and the little ladyshows up at the doctor's office."Doctor, it's really bad today. Please, you have to help me!!""Well, let's have a look," he says as he lifts her up onto thetable."Oh, yes, I think I see the problem. Nurse, bring me a surgicalkit. Don't worry ma'am this won't hurt a bit."The dwarf lady closes her eyes in painful anticipation. Thedoctor begins snipping away and finishes a few minutes later."There you go, ma'am, try that."She walks back and forth around the office and exclaims,"That's great, Doc, what did you do?!"To which the doctor replied,"I just took a couple of inches off the top of your rain boots."A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After All, this was a very delicate matter. After the surgery was complete, everyone was astounded at the man's new face.He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful Beauty!One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me.How can I possibly repay you?""My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."One day a man who was cross with his wife said to her; you are like a McDonalds hamburger- cheap, fat and greasy! The wife replies in a vigorous rage; and you are like a toilet- either taking the piss, look like crap or full of shit!</blockquote>

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