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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064220269" data-attributes="member: 14320">Another Night Before ChristmasTwas the night before Christmas and all through the house.Not a creature was stirring, except for my mouse.No kids lived with me, so I thought I would chatter.There'd be no damn reindeer, and so stupid clatter.There'd be no fat elf, coming through my chimney.I'll be alone, my computer and me.I won't race to the window, to see him arrive.I'll just sit right here...with windows ninety-five.There's no one I know, as I'm surfing around.None of my regular buddies are found.I went in some chat rooms, but quickly got out.Age, sex, location is all that's about.As, I was about to go check out the net.I got an E-mail which I didn't expect.A lady told me, she had read my profile.And, ask, if I might like to chat for a while.She said, if I didn't, then she would just leave.But, she was so lonely, on this Christmas Eve.She said, it's the first time, she'd ever been on.But, she heard, computers, could be so much fun.She said, the computer, was usually locked tight.But, she said, her husband, left it on... tonight.He's away on some business; He'll be gone all night.So, she thought she'd use it, " I guess it's all right."She started to tell me, about her whole life.How she was expected to be a good wife.She talked of her anger, frustrations, and needs.Because she was forced, to do such silly deeds.She talked on and on, from one thing to the next.Then finally told me.....she was oversexed.She didn't have sex, with her husband, she told.He was always too busy, and getting too old.Then, she wrote me something, that made my heart vex.She asked me to teach her , to have cyber-sex.I said, if she wanted me to, that I could.Then after an hour, she got really good.After five hours, my fingers were sore.I told her, that I couldn't go anymore.She said, that was fine, because she was tired too.And anyway, her husband, soon would be due.She said she would be on, the same time next year.Then asked, if I wouldn't mind, meeting her here.She said only...on this night, she could be foundIt is only...this night, her husband leaves town.She said bye, and signed off...and i had to pause.I think I just cybered with Mrs. Santa Claus!The night before XXXmasTwas the night befor Christmas, and God it was neat.The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat.The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook,It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.Momma in her teddy and I in the nude,Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube.When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,That I lost my boner, and momma went dry.Up to the window I sprang like an elf,Tore back the shade while she played with herself.The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built,Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.When what to my wondering eyes should appear,But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangey reindeer.With a fat little driver, half out of the sled,A sock in his ear and a bra on his head.Sure as I'm speaking, he was high as a kite,And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.Woa Shithead, woa Asshole, woa Stupid, woa Putz,Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.I was donning my jockies, to cover my ass,When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore."That was some brothel," he said with a smile,"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay awhile"He walked to the kitchen for himself poured a drink,Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee,The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack,But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find,And six pair of panties, the edible kind.A bra without nipples, a penis extension,And several more things I shouldn't even mention.A fuck ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,And a dildo so long that it lay in a coil."This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Santa will shit,So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."He filled every stocking and then took his leave,With one tiny butt plug stuck under his sleeve.He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.In time he was seated, took reigns of his hitch,Saying, "Take me home, Rudolf. This night's been a bitch!"The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout,"The best thing about pussy is you can't wear it out!!"</blockquote>

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