Menu
Home
Post Something
Forums
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
News & Features
The Marketplace
Cars for Sale
Engine and Performance
Chassis and Wheels
Exterior and Body
Interior and Cockpit
ICE - In Car Entertainment
Car Shops and Services
Toys and Wares
All Other Stuff
Jobs and Vacancies
Looking For
Members
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Reply to thread
See what others are reading now! Try Forums >
Current Activity
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Message
<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064373055" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Dr. Stooge's Purity Test</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Have you done it on a boat?</p><p>Have you done it with a goat?</p><p>Have you done it in a bed?</p><p>Have you done it with the dead?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it in the ass?</p><p>Have you done it, high on grass?</p><p>Have you done it in the car?</p><p>Have you simply gone too far?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it on the beach?</p><p>Have you done it with the teach?</p><p>Have you done it on your back?</p><p>Have you done it strapped to a rack?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it in a box?</p><p>Have you done it with a fox?</p><p>Have you done it in a tree?</p><p>Have you done it with more than me?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it in the rain?</p><p>Have you done it for the pain?</p><p>Have you done it 'tween the tits?</p><p>Have you done it wearing mitts?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it packed in rubber?</p><p>Have you done it undercover?</p><p>Have you done it on a perch?</p><p>Have you done it in a church?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it with a virgin?</p><p>Have you done it with a sturgeon?</p><p>Have you done it with ropes and chains?</p><p>Have you done it while insane?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it on the stage?</p><p>Have you done it underage?</p><p>Have you done it with your friends?</p><p>Have you done it in both ends?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it with your dog?</p><p>Have you done it on a log?</p><p>Have you done it with a champ?</p><p>Have you done it with a vamp?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it for all to see?</p><p>Have you ever had VD?</p><p>Have you done it on the couch?</p><p>Have you done it in your mouth?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it while on tape?</p><p>Have you done it out of shape?</p><p>Have you done it on live TV?</p><p>Have you done it whilst you pee?</p><p></p><p>Have you done it in the gym?</p><p>Have you done it on a whim?</p><p>Have you done it on a dare?</p><p>Do you really think we care?</p><p></p><p>Answer these and count your "no's",</p><p>pray this number never grows;</p><p>Fifty questions we asked thee,</p><p>score times two is your Purity.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Q: What's the definition of a virgin?</p><p>A: An ugly second grader.</p><p></p><p>Q: Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow?</p><p>A: So when you pull on their tits they don't shit on you.</p><p></p><p>Q: What is the difference between a prostitute and a bowling ball?</p><p>A: You can't fit a prostitute inside a bowling ball.</p><p></p><p>Q: What do women & dog turds have in common?</p><p>A: The older they are, the easier they are to pick up!</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Vision Problems</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A woman having vision problems went to see an eye doctor. She said "Doctor I'm having trouble with my vision can you help me?" The doctor said "have a seat and I will give you an eye test" The woman sat down and faced the wall in front of an eye chart. The doctor pointed to the last line and said "can you read this". The woman said, "Oh no doctor I can't see that." The doctor then pointed to another line and the woman again said "oh no doctor I can't see that." The doctor became frustrated and decided to move the woman closer to the eye chart. He pointed to the top line on the chart and asked the woman can you see that now?" The woman said "Doctor I still can't see that!" Then the doctor unzipped his fly, pulled out his cock and said to the woman can you see that?" The woman exclaimed, "Oh doctor I can see that perfectly!" The doctor said to the woman, "Oh that's your trouble, you're cock-eyed!"</p><p></p><p></p><p>An elderly couple sat through a porno movie twice. They didn't get up</p><p>to leave until the theater was ready to close for the night. "You folks</p><p></p><p>must've enjoyed the show," the usher said.</p><p></p><p>"Disgusting," said the old lady. "It was revolting," her husband added.</p><p></p><p>"Then why did you sit through it twice?" the usher asks.</p><p></p><p>"We had to wait until you turned up the house lights," the old lady</p><p>replied. "We couldn't find my panties, and his teeth were in them!"</p><p></p><p></p><p>Q: What's a 6.9?</p><p>A: A 69 interrupted by a period!</p><p></p><p>Q. Why is sperm donation more expensive than blood donation?</p><p>A. Because its hand made.</p><p></p><p>Q. What's the definition of confusion?</p><p>A. Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Q. Why did the snowman pull down his pants?</p><p>A. Because he heard the snow blower coming</p><p></p><p></p><p>Why does a penis have a hole in the end of it?</p><p>So men can be open minded.</p><p></p><p>A husband comes home and says to his wife" we've tried 69 lets try 68"</p><p>She says, "What’s that?" He says, " you do me and I'll owe you one."</p><p></p><p></p><p>A waitress walking to a table in a restaurant sees 4 foreign businessmen, furiously jerking off. She takes their orders and before walking back she asks the businessmen: "gentlemen, may I ask you, why are you so frantically jerking off? "</p><p>The businessmen reply: "menu says: first come first served”</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Things Never To Say During Sex...</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Part 2</span></strong></p><p></p><p>42) I think my dad is listening at the door.</p><p>43) smile for the camera, honey!!!</p><p>44) take off that damn monkey glove!!</p><p>45) get your hand out of there!!</p><p>46) I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago.</p><p>47) I knew you wore a padded bra!!</p><p>48) cover me boys, I'm going in!!!</p><p>49) DIVE! DIVE! DIVE!</p><p>50) Fire one!</p><p>51) God, that is small!!</p><p>52) hold on, let me change the channel...</p><p>53) who smells like fish?</p><p>54) is it O.K. if my mom (and/or dad) joins in?</p><p>55) your best-friend does it much better.</p><p>56) hope you don't mind I left my boots on.</p><p>57) hurry up, the motor's runnin'.</p><p>58) you're fogging up the wind-shield.</p><p>59) can I borrow 5 bucks?</p><p>60) what the hell noise was that?!</p><p>61) stop moaning, you sound so stupid.</p><p>62) shut up, bitch! (worse if the girl says it)</p><p>63) you know, you're not really attractive.</p><p>64) I'm sorry, I was not listening.</p><p>65) what, oh yea, I love you too, now let me concentrate!!</p><p>66) stop interrupting me!!</p><p>67) I have to take a shit.</p><p>68) did I leave the iron on?</p><p>69) your breath is funky.</p><p>70) (start singing Green Day) .</p><p>71) is it O.K. if I call someone, its O.K. though, keep going....</p><p>72) its OK honey, I can imagine that its bigger.</p><p>73) god I wish you were a real woman.</p><p>74) why can't you ever shave your legs?</p><p>75) by the way, when I drove over here, I ran over your dog....</p><p>76) oh Susan, Susan... I mean donna.... shit.</p><p>77) your breast milk is like my mom's....</p><p>78) you're hairy!!</p><p>79) your "happy trail" led me to a dead end.</p><p>80) is it O.K. if I never see you again?</p><p>81) did I forget to tell you I got worms from my cat?</p><p>82) don't make that face at me!</p><p>83) all of a sudden I have a headache.</p><p>84) you're boring.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">No Panties</span></strong></p><p></p><p>There is a girl walking up the stairs in a church one day. As the priest is</p><p>walking by, he looks up and notices that this girl is not wearing any panties.</p><p>He then calls the girl and gives her $50 and says "Little girl, take this money and</p><p>buy yourself some panties as it is not good to walk around without any panties on."</p><p>The girl then goes home and gives the money to her mother and asks</p><p>her mother to buy panties for her. When the mother asks where the girl got the</p><p>money from, the girl explained what happened. Upon hearing how the girl got the money,</p><p>the mother rushes to her room, whips off her panties, and puts on one of her</p><p>shortest dresses and runs out to the church.</p><p>As soon as the mother sees the priest</p><p>coming, she begins to walk up the stairs. The priest then notices the lady and calls her down.</p><p>The woman not wanting to show that she is expecting anything walks back to the</p><p>priest very calmly. The priest then gives the lady $1 and says,</p><p>"Take this money and for God's Sakes, buy yourself a razor!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">-===(</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and</p><p>finds a stranger fucking his wife. He says, "What the hell</p><p>are you two doing?"</p><p>His wife turns to the stranger and says, "Didn't I tell you what a</p><p>stupid shit he is."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">-===(</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Mrs. Speidell, who was a little on the chubby side,</p><p>was at her weight-watchers meeting . "My husband insists</p><p>I come to these meetings because he would rather screw a</p><p>woman with a trim figure." she lamented to the woman next</p><p>to her.</p><p></p><p>"Well," the lady replied, "what's wrong with that?"</p><p></p><p>"He likes to do it while I'm stuck at these damn meetings."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064373055, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Dr. Stooge's Purity Test[/COLOR][/B] Have you done it on a boat? Have you done it with a goat? Have you done it in a bed? Have you done it with the dead? Have you done it in the ass? Have you done it, high on grass? Have you done it in the car? Have you simply gone too far? Have you done it on the beach? Have you done it with the teach? Have you done it on your back? Have you done it strapped to a rack? Have you done it in a box? Have you done it with a fox? Have you done it in a tree? Have you done it with more than me? Have you done it in the rain? Have you done it for the pain? Have you done it 'tween the tits? Have you done it wearing mitts? Have you done it packed in rubber? Have you done it undercover? Have you done it on a perch? Have you done it in a church? Have you done it with a virgin? Have you done it with a sturgeon? Have you done it with ropes and chains? Have you done it while insane? Have you done it on the stage? Have you done it underage? Have you done it with your friends? Have you done it in both ends? Have you done it with your dog? Have you done it on a log? Have you done it with a champ? Have you done it with a vamp? Have you done it for all to see? Have you ever had VD? Have you done it on the couch? Have you done it in your mouth? Have you done it while on tape? Have you done it out of shape? Have you done it on live TV? Have you done it whilst you pee? Have you done it in the gym? Have you done it on a whim? Have you done it on a dare? Do you really think we care? Answer these and count your "no's", pray this number never grows; Fifty questions we asked thee, score times two is your Purity. [B][COLOR="Red"]~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~[/COLOR][/B] Q: What's the definition of a virgin? A: An ugly second grader. Q: Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow? A: So when you pull on their tits they don't shit on you. Q: What is the difference between a prostitute and a bowling ball? A: You can't fit a prostitute inside a bowling ball. Q: What do women & dog turds have in common? A: The older they are, the easier they are to pick up! [B][COLOR="Teal"]Vision Problems[/COLOR][/B] A woman having vision problems went to see an eye doctor. She said "Doctor I'm having trouble with my vision can you help me?" The doctor said "have a seat and I will give you an eye test" The woman sat down and faced the wall in front of an eye chart. The doctor pointed to the last line and said "can you read this". The woman said, "Oh no doctor I can't see that." The doctor then pointed to another line and the woman again said "oh no doctor I can't see that." The doctor became frustrated and decided to move the woman closer to the eye chart. He pointed to the top line on the chart and asked the woman can you see that now?" The woman said "Doctor I still can't see that!" Then the doctor unzipped his fly, pulled out his cock and said to the woman can you see that?" The woman exclaimed, "Oh doctor I can see that perfectly!" The doctor said to the woman, "Oh that's your trouble, you're cock-eyed!" An elderly couple sat through a porno movie twice. They didn't get up to leave until the theater was ready to close for the night. "You folks must've enjoyed the show," the usher said. "Disgusting," said the old lady. "It was revolting," her husband added. "Then why did you sit through it twice?" the usher asks. "We had to wait until you turned up the house lights," the old lady replied. "We couldn't find my panties, and his teeth were in them!" Q: What's a 6.9? A: A 69 interrupted by a period! Q. Why is sperm donation more expensive than blood donation? A. Because its hand made. Q. What's the definition of confusion? A. Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market. Q. Why did the snowman pull down his pants? A. Because he heard the snow blower coming Why does a penis have a hole in the end of it? So men can be open minded. A husband comes home and says to his wife" we've tried 69 lets try 68" She says, "What’s that?" He says, " you do me and I'll owe you one." A waitress walking to a table in a restaurant sees 4 foreign businessmen, furiously jerking off. She takes their orders and before walking back she asks the businessmen: "gentlemen, may I ask you, why are you so frantically jerking off? " The businessmen reply: "menu says: first come first served” [B][COLOR="Teal"]Things Never To Say During Sex... Part 2[/COLOR][/B] 42) I think my dad is listening at the door. 43) smile for the camera, honey!!! 44) take off that damn monkey glove!! 45) get your hand out of there!! 46) I think the condom broke 10 minutes ago. 47) I knew you wore a padded bra!! 48) cover me boys, I'm going in!!! 49) DIVE! DIVE! DIVE! 50) Fire one! 51) God, that is small!! 52) hold on, let me change the channel... 53) who smells like fish? 54) is it O.K. if my mom (and/or dad) joins in? 55) your best-friend does it much better. 56) hope you don't mind I left my boots on. 57) hurry up, the motor's runnin'. 58) you're fogging up the wind-shield. 59) can I borrow 5 bucks? 60) what the hell noise was that?! 61) stop moaning, you sound so stupid. 62) shut up, bitch! (worse if the girl says it) 63) you know, you're not really attractive. 64) I'm sorry, I was not listening. 65) what, oh yea, I love you too, now let me concentrate!! 66) stop interrupting me!! 67) I have to take a shit. 68) did I leave the iron on? 69) your breath is funky. 70) (start singing Green Day) . 71) is it O.K. if I call someone, its O.K. though, keep going.... 72) its OK honey, I can imagine that its bigger. 73) god I wish you were a real woman. 74) why can't you ever shave your legs? 75) by the way, when I drove over here, I ran over your dog.... 76) oh Susan, Susan... I mean donna.... shit. 77) your breast milk is like my mom's.... 78) you're hairy!! 79) your "happy trail" led me to a dead end. 80) is it O.K. if I never see you again? 81) did I forget to tell you I got worms from my cat? 82) don't make that face at me! 83) all of a sudden I have a headache. 84) you're boring. [B][COLOR="Teal"]No Panties[/COLOR][/B] There is a girl walking up the stairs in a church one day. As the priest is walking by, he looks up and notices that this girl is not wearing any panties. He then calls the girl and gives her $50 and says "Little girl, take this money and buy yourself some panties as it is not good to walk around without any panties on." The girl then goes home and gives the money to her mother and asks her mother to buy panties for her. When the mother asks where the girl got the money from, the girl explained what happened. Upon hearing how the girl got the money, the mother rushes to her room, whips off her panties, and puts on one of her shortest dresses and runs out to the church. As soon as the mother sees the priest coming, she begins to walk up the stairs. The priest then notices the lady and calls her down. The woman not wanting to show that she is expecting anything walks back to the priest very calmly. The priest then gives the lady $1 and says, "Take this money and for God's Sakes, buy yourself a razor!" [B][COLOR="Red"]-===([/COLOR][/B] A guy comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger fucking his wife. He says, "What the hell are you two doing?" His wife turns to the stranger and says, "Didn't I tell you what a stupid shit he is." [B][COLOR="Red"]-===([/COLOR][/B] Mrs. Speidell, who was a little on the chubby side, was at her weight-watchers meeting . "My husband insists I come to these meetings because he would rather screw a woman with a trim figure." she lamented to the woman next to her. "Well," the lady replied, "what's wrong with that?" "He likes to do it while I'm stuck at these damn meetings." [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
The Marketplace Latest
original rare Enkei ES Tarmac 15x7jj offset +35 4H...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
original rare Rays Volk Racing SE37 17x7.5jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
original rare Yokohama ADVAN Racing TC4 18x8.5...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
original rare Rays Volk Racing ZE40 17x9jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
original rare Rays Volk Racing INGS TS06 18x8jj...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
New original Defi Advance A1 NA package triple...
Started by
david tao
Engine and Performance
original rare Rays Volk Racing CE28 16x7jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
Honda Jazz/Fit JSracing GTwing Spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Toyota Vios NCP93 front bonnet hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Honda civic fc varis spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Posts refresh every 5 minutes
Turbo compression ratio relative to NA car compression ratio
I would like to seek some other opinion from the turbo otai about this subject. As we know NA car compression ration is about 12-14:1. Bear in mind that is negetive pressure, the most is 0 bar or atmospheric...
VTG Track Day-23 Nov 2009
View attachment 679700
There are booth spaces for rental. Please contact the person(s) on the above flyer.
engine help! revving out early!!
hey guys, new to these boards and ive a problem already!:embaressed_smile: .
once i hit about 6500-7000RPM the engine starts spluttering out (not revving out) any ideas guys???
car is a '95 mitsi lancer mivec 1.6...
Recent Posts
Darker Design : Mercedes-Benz Launches GLA Nightfall Edition in Malaysia
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Honda Malaysia Doubles Down on Hybrids: New CR-V Launches with Dual e:HEV...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
BateriHub Reaches 200-Store Milestone, Becomes Malaysia’s Largest...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Been stalking for 3 years edy
Started by
dheepadarshan95
Introduction and Newbies
Recommendation: Turbocharger for 4B11 N.A engine
Started by
Mitevo7
Car Modification
Search
Online now
Enjoying Zerotohundred?
Log-in
for an ad-less experience
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
