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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064546714" data-attributes="member: 14320">The Ugliest WifeThese three guys are sitting at a bar arguing which one has the ugliestwife. The conversation begins to get heated to the point of the barkeepertelling them to get the hell out or shut up! In fact he says, "why don'tyou settle it once and for all and just visit each others house anddecide for yourselves..."Damn Good idea they agree, finish their drinks and make off for thefirst guys house.Upon arriving he bangs on his door and the wife answers,she's not pretty and he turns to collect the bet from the other two.Not so fast says the second, I got that beat.And off they go to his house... Hebangs on the door and his wife comes to answer the door opens and all threestep back in fright, she's damn ugly. He asks to collect the bet but thethird guy says sorry I've got you both beat.He goes to his house and walks right in, there's no sign of anyonearound. He stomps his foot on the trap door in the floor and they all hearthis voice say "Is that you honey?""Yeah it's me," he says."Do you want me to come out?" she asks"Yes please," he says."Should I put the bag on my head?" she asks.He says, "No. I don't want to fuck you, I just want to show you off!"====================A mortician was laying out the body of a man with an unbelievably long penis.He called in his receptionist to show her.She took one look and said, "It's just like my husband's penis.""Wow, you mean he's got one that long?" the mortician asked."No," she replied. "That dead."</blockquote>

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