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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064621725" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>Murphy's Laws On Sex</p><p></p><p>*The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave </p><p>her with no hard feelings. </p><p></p><p>*Nothing improves with age. </p><p></p><p>*No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because </p><p>it'll never be quite the same again. </p><p></p><p>*Sex has no calories. </p><p></p><p>*Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of </p><p>trouble. </p><p></p><p>*There is no remedy for sex but more sex. </p><p></p><p>*Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got. </p><p></p><p>*No sex with anyone in the same office. </p><p></p><p>*Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or </p><p>how long it is going to last.</p><p></p><p>*Virginity can be cured. </p><p></p><p>*Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. </p><p></p><p>*The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same </p><p>ones she can't stand years later. </p><p></p><p>*Sex is dirty only if it's done right. </p><p></p><p>*It is always the wrong time of month. </p><p></p><p>*When the lights are out, all women are beautiful. </p><p></p><p>*Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't </p><p>either. </p><p></p><p>*Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for crop </p><p>failure. </p><p></p><p>*The younger the better. </p><p></p><p>*Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly. </p><p></p><p>*Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs. </p><p></p><p>*Love your neighbor, but don't get caught. </p><p></p><p>*If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into </p><p>our space program, we would now be running hot-dog stands on the moon. </p><p></p><p>*Love is a matter of chemistry. Sex is a matter of physics. </p><p></p><p>*Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned four-letter </p><p>words to convey its full meaning. </p><p></p><p>*You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women. </p><p></p><p>*Thou shall not commit adultery.....unless in the mood. </p><p></p><p>*A woman never forgets the men she could have had. A man, the women he </p><p>couldn't. </p><p></p><p>*What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick. </p><p></p><p>*A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride. </p><p></p><p>*Love comes in spurts. </p><p></p><p>*Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are </p><p>unimportant. </p><p></p><p>*Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. </p><p></p><p>*Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064621725, member: 14320"] Murphy's Laws On Sex *The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings. *Nothing improves with age. *No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again. *Sex has no calories. *Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. *There is no remedy for sex but more sex. *Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got. *No sex with anyone in the same office. *Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last. *Virginity can be cured. *Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. *The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same ones she can't stand years later. *Sex is dirty only if it's done right. *It is always the wrong time of month. *When the lights are out, all women are beautiful. *Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either. *Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for crop failure. *The younger the better. *Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly. *Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs. *Love your neighbor, but don't get caught. *If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot-dog stands on the moon. *Love is a matter of chemistry. Sex is a matter of physics. *Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned four-letter words to convey its full meaning. *You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women. *Thou shall not commit adultery.....unless in the mood. *A woman never forgets the men she could have had. A man, the women he couldn't. *What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick. *A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride. *Love comes in spurts. *Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant. *Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. *Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. [/QUOTE]
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