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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064633016" data-attributes="member: 14320">All Crumpled UpA man sits reading his paper when his wife enters the house;she approaches him in a most provocative manner."Have you ever seen a twenty dollar bill all crumpled up?" she asks in a soft sweet voice.Not knowing what to make of this situation he replies "No."Pursing her lips she give him a sexy little smile, reaches into her cleavage and slowly pulls out a crumpled twenty dollar bill.Then stepping closer in she asks in a low sexy voice "Have you ever seen a fifty all crumpled up?" Intrigued he answers "Uh, no."She gives him another sexy little smile, seductively reaches into her panties and ever so slowly removes a crumpled fifty dollar bill."Now" she says as she leans down and whispers "Have you ever seen 30,000 dollars all crumpled up?"Totally confused and excited he stammers "No-o-o-o-o.""Well" she whispers in his ear, "then go look in the garage..."=====A couple in their eighties just got married and is on their honeymoon. In the hotel room she slips into something sexy and crawls into bed and waits for her new groom. He's in the bathroom sprucing himself up. She waits and waits until she can't wait any longer. She gets up and goes to the bathroom and opens the door. Peering in she sees him bent over on the toilet trying to put on a condom. She giggles, "Honey what are you doing? I'm 86 years old and can't get pregnant anymore." He looks up at her and says; I know but honey you know how dampness affects my arthritis.</blockquote>

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