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JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064647811" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>MEN - MEASURE UP!</p><p></p><p>1. Disrobe and stand by your keyboard. Rest your left testicle in</p><p>the rounded hollow on top of the "1" key. Rest your right testicle</p><p>in the key immediately below that. (You lumberjacks may have to</p><p>use the A or even the Z key).</p><p>2. Grasp your thing in your right hand and slap it firmly across</p><p>the number key row on your keyboard.</p><p>3. Place a copy of the latest Playboy centerfold open at a distance</p><p>of 2.5 feet. Rest your thing on the keyboard and stare intently</p><p>at the picture for five minutes, or until your feet leave the</p><p>ground. Repeat the above test.</p><p></p><p>Cautions:</p><p>1. Do not attempt this test after swimming. You will skew the</p><p>results.</p><p>2. Black men may wish to use a special extended keyboard; or</p><p>place two keyboards end to end.</p><p>3. If you try this test on a public keyboard, you may want to</p><p>swab it down with alcohol first.</p><p>4. On some keyboards, severe sparking may result. Be sure to keep</p><p>a fire extinguisher handy, and DON'T BE AFRAID TO USE IT.</p><p>5. Do not turn around suddenly and slap the monitor.</p><p></p><p>Test Results Diagnosis:</p><p>If you *score* a "1" -- You suffer from Short Penis Syndrome.</p><p>If you *score* "12367" -- You have a strange gap in your penis.</p><p>If you *score* "12efgbn" -- Your penis has a right hand bend;</p><p>sometimes called a *hook*.</p><p>If you *score* "12wgui,l=]\ " -- Seek immediate medical care.</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>I guess I DO have a dirty mind. I always thought the </p><p>song "Come Together" was about simultaneous orgasms.</p><p></p><p>Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of </p><p>peanut butter?</p><p>A. A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064647811, member: 14320"] MEN - MEASURE UP! 1. Disrobe and stand by your keyboard. Rest your left testicle in the rounded hollow on top of the "1" key. Rest your right testicle in the key immediately below that. (You lumberjacks may have to use the A or even the Z key). 2. Grasp your thing in your right hand and slap it firmly across the number key row on your keyboard. 3. Place a copy of the latest Playboy centerfold open at a distance of 2.5 feet. Rest your thing on the keyboard and stare intently at the picture for five minutes, or until your feet leave the ground. Repeat the above test. Cautions: 1. Do not attempt this test after swimming. You will skew the results. 2. Black men may wish to use a special extended keyboard; or place two keyboards end to end. 3. If you try this test on a public keyboard, you may want to swab it down with alcohol first. 4. On some keyboards, severe sparking may result. Be sure to keep a fire extinguisher handy, and DON'T BE AFRAID TO USE IT. 5. Do not turn around suddenly and slap the monitor. Test Results Diagnosis: If you *score* a "1" -- You suffer from Short Penis Syndrome. If you *score* "12367" -- You have a strange gap in your penis. If you *score* "12efgbn" -- Your penis has a right hand bend; sometimes called a *hook*. If you *score* "12wgui,l=]\ " -- Seek immediate medical care. ===== I guess I DO have a dirty mind. I always thought the song "Come Together" was about simultaneous orgasms. Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter? A. A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth! [/QUOTE]
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