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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064647811" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>MEN - MEASURE UP!</p><p></p><p>1. Disrobe and stand by your keyboard. Rest your left testicle in</p><p>the rounded hollow on top of the "1" key. Rest your right testicle</p><p>in the key immediately below that. (You lumberjacks may have to</p><p>use the A or even the Z key).</p><p>2. Grasp your thing in your right hand and slap it firmly across</p><p>the number key row on your keyboard.</p><p>3. Place a copy of the latest Playboy centerfold open at a distance</p><p>of 2.5 feet. Rest your thing on the keyboard and stare intently</p><p>at the picture for five minutes, or until your feet leave the</p><p>ground. Repeat the above test.</p><p></p><p>Cautions:</p><p>1. Do not attempt this test after swimming. You will skew the</p><p>results.</p><p>2. Black men may wish to use a special extended keyboard; or</p><p>place two keyboards end to end.</p><p>3. If you try this test on a public keyboard, you may want to</p><p>swab it down with alcohol first.</p><p>4. On some keyboards, severe sparking may result. Be sure to keep</p><p>a fire extinguisher handy, and DON'T BE AFRAID TO USE IT.</p><p>5. Do not turn around suddenly and slap the monitor.</p><p></p><p>Test Results Diagnosis:</p><p>If you *score* a "1" -- You suffer from Short Penis Syndrome.</p><p>If you *score* "12367" -- You have a strange gap in your penis.</p><p>If you *score* "12efgbn" -- Your penis has a right hand bend;</p><p>sometimes called a *hook*.</p><p>If you *score* "12wgui,l=]\ " -- Seek immediate medical care.</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>I guess I DO have a dirty mind. I always thought the </p><p>song "Come Together" was about simultaneous orgasms.</p><p></p><p>Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of </p><p>peanut butter?</p><p>A. A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth!</p></blockquote><p></p>

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