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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064648022" data-attributes="member: 14320">Dear Baby DoctorDear Baby Doctor,What is the most common pregnancy craving?A. For men to be the ones who get pregnant.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,My husband and I are very attractive. I'm sure our baby will bebeautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?A. Your therapist.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?A. If it's the flu, you'll get better.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear end, and even my feethave grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?A. Yes, your bladder.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?A. Because you're fatter then they are.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,Will I love my dog less when the baby is born?A. No, but your husband might get on your nerves.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What's the difference between a nine-months pregnant woman and aPlayboy centerfold?A. Nothing, if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor,but pressure. Is she right?A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,I'm modest. Once I'm in the hospital to deliver, who will see mein that delicate position?A. Authorized personnel only -- doctors, nurses, orderlies,photographers, florists, cleaning crews, journalists, etc.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,Does labor cause hemorrhoids?A. Labor causes anything you want to blame it for.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,Is there a safe alternative to breast pumps?A. Yes, baby lips.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?A. It means that the baby's mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What are the terrible twos?A. Your breasts after baby stops nursing cold turkey.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What happens to disposable diapers after they're thrown away?A. They are stored in a silo in the Midwest, in the event of globalchemical warfare.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What is colic?A. A reminder for new parents to use birth control.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,What are night terrors?A. Frightening episodes in which the new mother dreams she's pregnant again.~~~Dear Baby Doctor,Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel andact normal again?A. When the kid is in college.</blockquote>