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JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064648827" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>The Wino</p><p></p><p>A tramp finds a five pound note in the street. He decides to go to the off-licence and buy a bottle of white wine. After duly knocking back the plonk the tramp falls into a drunken torpor and collapses in a small alleyway. </p><p></p><p>About ten minutes later a passing homosexual happens upon the sprawled body of the tramp. Not having greased the pole for a while the shirt-lifter whips down the tramps keks and gives him one up the old Gary Glitter. As the rear-gunner is just about to leave he gets a pang of conscience and tucks a five pound note into the tramps hand. </p><p></p><p>Upon waking up the next day the tramp discovers the fiver. Hardly believing his good fortune he rushes back to the off-licence and purchases another bottle of white wine. Yet again he downs the vino and falls into a drunken sleep in his favorite alleyway. A little later the same chutney ferret passes the alleyway and sees the tramp. Unable to contain himself, the uphill gardener divests the tramp of his jockeys and gives him another hoop stretching. Again he leaves five pounds out of guilt for his actions. </p><p></p><p>Upon waking up the tramp discovers another fiver in his hand and so hastens back to the off-licence. He grabs a bottle of red wine and hands it to the sales assistant for wrapping. The sales assistant, by now familiar with the tramps usual habits, asks why he is buying red wine this time to which the tramp responds, I quite like the white wine but it doesn't half make my fucking arse sore.</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>Blonde Moment!</p><p></p><p>Two drunk blondes are stranded in the middle of nowhere trying to get</p><p>home. The first blonde needs to take a piss bad so she tromps off into </p><p>the bushes.</p><p>After almost 10 minutes the second blonde begins to get worried and </p><p>heads into the field to look for the first. She walks for almost a</p><p>kilometer</p><p>until she finally finds the first blonde.... kneeling beneath a horse,</p><p>sucking its cock. </p><p>"What in the world are you doing that for???" asks the second blonde. </p><p>The first blonde sucks her lips away from the huge cock and drools,</p><p>"Hold </p><p>on, I think I may be able to get us a free ride home!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064648827, member: 14320"] The Wino A tramp finds a five pound note in the street. He decides to go to the off-licence and buy a bottle of white wine. After duly knocking back the plonk the tramp falls into a drunken torpor and collapses in a small alleyway. About ten minutes later a passing homosexual happens upon the sprawled body of the tramp. Not having greased the pole for a while the shirt-lifter whips down the tramps keks and gives him one up the old Gary Glitter. As the rear-gunner is just about to leave he gets a pang of conscience and tucks a five pound note into the tramps hand. Upon waking up the next day the tramp discovers the fiver. Hardly believing his good fortune he rushes back to the off-licence and purchases another bottle of white wine. Yet again he downs the vino and falls into a drunken sleep in his favorite alleyway. A little later the same chutney ferret passes the alleyway and sees the tramp. Unable to contain himself, the uphill gardener divests the tramp of his jockeys and gives him another hoop stretching. Again he leaves five pounds out of guilt for his actions. Upon waking up the tramp discovers another fiver in his hand and so hastens back to the off-licence. He grabs a bottle of red wine and hands it to the sales assistant for wrapping. The sales assistant, by now familiar with the tramps usual habits, asks why he is buying red wine this time to which the tramp responds, I quite like the white wine but it doesn't half make my fucking arse sore. ===== Blonde Moment! Two drunk blondes are stranded in the middle of nowhere trying to get home. The first blonde needs to take a piss bad so she tromps off into the bushes. After almost 10 minutes the second blonde begins to get worried and heads into the field to look for the first. She walks for almost a kilometer until she finally finds the first blonde.... kneeling beneath a horse, sucking its cock. "What in the world are you doing that for???" asks the second blonde. The first blonde sucks her lips away from the huge cock and drools, "Hold on, I think I may be able to get us a free ride home!" [/QUOTE]
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