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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3023980" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong>Signs Your Wife Is Bored With Sex</strong></p><p></p><p>1. No longer just answers the phone, but MAKES calls</p><p></p><p>2. Instead of leaving just her top on, she wants to leave her</p><p>panties on too</p><p></p><p>3. You are currently sitting backstage at the Springer show</p><p></p><p>4. Has suddenly started telling you to pay in advance</p><p></p><p>5. Claims "The Joy of Sex" has to be a fiction novel</p><p></p><p>6. Asks if you'd like a threesome; then the third party is a man</p><p></p><p>7. Has a large assortment of masks, and requests you wear one</p><p></p><p>8. After you request sex she replies, "Wait 'til all the pills</p><p>kick in"</p><p></p><p>9. Bangs her head on the headboard before you begin</p><p></p><p>10. Doesn't mind "doggie" at all -- she can use her laptop easier</p><p></p><p>11. Starts her fake orgasms during foreplay</p><p></p><p>12. Gets upset when the ashtray falls off your ass</p><p></p><p>13. Screams during sex only if she wins at solitaire</p><p></p><p>14. Has to "Check on the kids" at least three times during sex</p><p></p><p>15. Only moans during commercial breaks</p><p></p><p>16. You discover her moans of delight are actually .wav files</p><p></p><p>17. During the act, she yells out, "Oh Baby... Yadda, Yadda, Yadda"</p><p></p><p>18. Keeps asking at what age men become impotent</p><p></p><p>19. Runs for vacant Senate seat in New York</p><p></p><p>20. Has gone on advanced fertilization therapy claiming to want</p><p>6 more kids</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3023980, member: 14320"] [B]Signs Your Wife Is Bored With Sex[/B] 1. No longer just answers the phone, but MAKES calls 2. Instead of leaving just her top on, she wants to leave her panties on too 3. You are currently sitting backstage at the Springer show 4. Has suddenly started telling you to pay in advance 5. Claims "The Joy of Sex" has to be a fiction novel 6. Asks if you'd like a threesome; then the third party is a man 7. Has a large assortment of masks, and requests you wear one 8. After you request sex she replies, "Wait 'til all the pills kick in" 9. Bangs her head on the headboard before you begin 10. Doesn't mind "doggie" at all -- she can use her laptop easier 11. Starts her fake orgasms during foreplay 12. Gets upset when the ashtray falls off your ass 13. Screams during sex only if she wins at solitaire 14. Has to "Check on the kids" at least three times during sex 15. Only moans during commercial breaks 16. You discover her moans of delight are actually .wav files 17. During the act, she yells out, "Oh Baby... Yadda, Yadda, Yadda" 18. Keeps asking at what age men become impotent 19. Runs for vacant Senate seat in New York 20. Has gone on advanced fertilization therapy claiming to want 6 more kids [/QUOTE]
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