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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3533745" data-attributes="member: 14320">Snappy Comeback Lines"Did you take a bath?""Why, Is there one missing?""Are you chewing gum?""No, I'm John Smith.""I want to buy a dress to put on around the house.""Yes, Madam. How large is your house?""What are you going to be when you graduate?""An old man""I spent three years in college taking medicine.""Are you well now?"Do you say a prayer before you eat?""No, we don't have to. My mother is a good cook.""I've got a surprise for you, honey. I brought a friend home fordinner.""Who wants to eat friends?""We are having mother for dinner, darling.""Make sure she's well done.""I want some rat poison.""Should I wrap it up or do you want to eat it right here?""It seems that everything I say to you goes in one earand out the other.""Well, I guess that's why I've got two ears.""May I hold your hand?""No, thanks, It isn't heavy.""Does water always come through the roof in this place?""No, sir, only when it rains.""When will you straighten out the house, dear?""Why? Is it tilted?""Do these stairs take you to the second floor?""No, you'll have to walk""Now that you're married, you should have some insurance"But why? My wife isn't dangerous.""I have changed my mind."Thank heaven! Does it work better now?"Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?Customer: What other colors do you have?~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Q. What is the Difference Between Pussy and Apple Pie?A. You can eat your mom's apple pie.Q. Why do women pierce their bellybutton?A. Place to hang their air freshener.Q. What is the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease?A. One is a cunning runt, and the other is a running cuntQ. What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?A. Yell at her.Q. What is a zebra?A. 26 sizes larger than an "A" bra.Q. What did the blind man say as he passed the fish market?A. Good morning GirlsQ. What's the difference between a woman and a fridge?A. A fridge doesn't fart when you pull your meat out!</blockquote>