Reply to thread

See what others are reading now! Try Forums > Current Activity

Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3608091" data-attributes="member: 14320">TEN WAYS TO TREAT MR. PENIS1.) You've gotta "introduce" yourself to Willy Wonderful, i.e., "Hi! I'mShirley! Nice to meet ya, big guy !". Don't dive on it's like it's a rawpiece of meat and you're a starving pitbull! Be gentle. Stroke him niceand easy. Make friends first.2.) When (Not "IF" ) giving oral sex, don't suck so hard that you make anindustrial vacuum cleaner appear as a dust buster and suck the man'seyeballs out of his sockets. Mr. Penis is a sensitive "guy" ya know. Begentle. Contrary to your practicing techniques in high school, the one who"Melts" the popsicle first is not the winner.3.) When sitting on top of a man, don't move too far forward or back. Upand down is fine. What you're gonna do if you do move too far forward andback is rip Mr. Penis right off Mr. Man's crotch. Mr. Penis isn't madefor that action. And, VERY Important. When going up and down, if youshould go up a little too high and Mr. Penis pops out, you are not abasketball net, and Willy Wonderful is not a golf ball ... your aim is notthat good, and your 100+ Lbs, and this little Newton thingy called gravitywill seriously injure Mr. Penis.4.) Hand jobs - When stroking a guy's Dick don't grab it like a bus railand start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don't use the love swordas if it's a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms, and rememberfriction is the problem ... lubrication, the cure.5.) Proper care of the love Tool - like any good tool you wanna keep aroundfor a while you've gotta take good care of it just as you do your dildo oryour car. Wash him off after and dry him gently. Oil him frequently, andhave him park in the garage as often as you can. Never bend, fold spindleor mutilate. You'll get years of use out of him that way.6.) If Mr. Penis appears uninterested, he's just being coy or stupid.That's where you have to use step #1 again. If no response, then you suregave him a good workout the first time. Good for you!7.) Never, ever play "crush the grapes" with Mr. Penis's two friends, Mr.Balls. Nothing can make Mr. Penis shrink faster. Not even ice or a nudePic of Janet Reno and the Queen Mother playing chess at the Naturalist beachlast July.8.) If you're a golfer, never use Mr. Penis as a tee.9.) If Mr. Penis can't "throw up" then his owner worked too hard onpleasing you. Be thankful. If Mr. Penis spits too soon, be proud that youhad that effect on him ... not everyone can have that effect on him.10.) If you don't want Mr. Penis so deep, don't say, "Shit! Not thatdeep!What are you doing ... drilling for oil??" Say, "Wow you're much biggerthan I thought. Could you take it a little easier on me?"And never never say "Is it in?"</blockquote>

Verification

The Marketplace Latest

original rare spec Rays Volk Racing RE30 15x7jj...
- Started by david tao
- Chassis and Wheels
original rare Rays Volk Racing TE37 SAGA S-Plus...
- Started by david tao
- Chassis and Wheels
original Swift Springs rear strut bar set made in...
- Started by david tao
- Chassis and Wheels
Proton Preve R3 body kit
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Perodua Ativa gear up body kit
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F10 Mperformance front skirt lip
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Honda Civic FC fk7si front bumper set
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
brake caliper spray
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3 bodykit/diffuser set
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Perodua Axia Rahmah bodykit
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body

Posts refresh every 5 minutes

Shell rewards five more lucky Malaysians with RM30,000

https://www.zerotohundred.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/Pic-3-600x399.jpg

The year of the Rabbit was ushered in by Shell with a lavish celebration for the five lucky winners of the Shell V-Power 97 ‘Win Weekly at...

Wtb : Tein Ss

Guys,
Any TEIN SS for E7? Please make your offer. TQ

0192584718

Altezza Wiring Diagram For Rs200 At

anyone can help to send me the wiring diagram for the altezza rs 200 AT, i need the ECU and the auto gearboax ECU diagram...........please help..........