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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4382209" data-attributes="member: 14320">"What Are You Doing?"A small boy was awoken in the middle of the night by strange noises from his parents" room, and he decided to investigate. As he entered their bedroom, he was shocked to see his mum and dad shagging for all they were worth."DAD!" he shouted. "What are you doing?""It’s ok," his father replied. "Your mother wants a baby, that’s all."The small boy, excited at the prospect of a new baby brother, was pleased and went back to bed with a smile on his face. Several weeks later, the little boy was walking past the bathroom and was shocked to discover his mother giving his father a blow job."DAD!" he shouted. "What are you doing now?""Son, there’s been a change of plan," his father replied. "Your mother did want a baby, but now she wants a BMW."YYYYYQ: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?A: Ask your mom.Q: How do you know you’re leading a sad life?A: When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let’s just be friends."Q: Are birth control pills deductible?A: Only if they don’t workQ: What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?A: If we don’t get some support soon, people are going to think we’re nuts.Q: What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster?A: A cock that stays up all night.Q: Mom’s have Mother’s Day, Father’s have Father’s Day. What do single guys have?A: Palm SundayQ: What do you call a ninety year old man who can still masturbate?A: Miracle Whip.Q: Why did they kick the midget out of the nudist colony?A: He was getting into everybody’s hair.Daffynition - Virgin: a girl who doesn't give a fuck.Q: Where do they post pictures of missing partial transsexuals?A: On cartons of half-and-half.YYYYYDEAR MADAM:THANK YOU FOR YOUR RECENT ORDER FROM OURSEX TOYS WEBSITE.YOU'VE REQUESTED THE LARGE RED VIBRATOR ASFEATURED ON OUR WALL DISPLAY.PLEASE SELECT ANOTHER ITEM.THAT'S OUR FIRE EXTINGUISHER.The CheckupA woman went with her husband to the doctor’s office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone.He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following, your husband will surely die.""Each morning, prepare him a good, healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don’t burden him with any jobs about the house. Don’t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, give him a blow job several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."On the way home, the husband asked his wife. "What did the doctor say?"He said you’re going to die," she replied.-=-=-=-=-=-The rude redhead was on a blind date set up by a friend. She wasdisgusted by him - he had bad teeth, and was fairly dirty."Wow," he said, "when I was told that you were fiery, I didn'trealize they meant you were a redhead.""Wow," she replied tartly, "I didn't realize that when they said youwere under six feet, they meant that's where they dug you up from."-=-=-=-=-=-Humpty Dumpty sat on the bed,Little Bo Peep was giving him head,As soon as he came she started to weep,She knew by the taste he'd been fucking her sheep.-=-=-=-=-=-Some guy is claiming that a tonic of beer and urine will improveyour garden. Come on, if that was true, wouldn't frat houses belike tropical rain forests?-=-=-=-=-=-How do you tell if you've had a really good night of oral sex?-You wake up with a lump in your throat and a string hanging outof your mouth.How can you tell if a pussy really stinks?-A fly lands on it and throws up.What's the definition of sick?-Sticking a prune up your Grandma's cunt, and sucking TWO out!!!</blockquote>

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