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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 2963803" data-attributes="member: 14320">You Might Be A Redneck If . . .. . . you think a lavatory is a breed of dog.. . . youâ€™ve ever taken a date flowers youâ€™ve stole from a cemetery.. . . youâ€™ve ever relieved yourself from a moving vehicle.. . . you use old auto parts as a boat anchor.. . . your pickup truck and wife are the same age.. . . your favorite cologne is Deep Woods Off.. . . youâ€™ve ever given livestock as a wedding present.. . . you think safe sex means putting on the emergency brake.. . . people hear your car a long time before they see it.. . . your 23-channel CB radio is used to communicate with your family.. . . your bridal veil was made of window screen.. . . you call your boss â€œdude.â€. . . you repaint your pink flamingo every spring... but not your house.. . . you have ever carried leftovers home in your handbag.. . . you think an oil change involves a comb and a bottle of Vitalis.. . . you whistle to get the attention of your waiter or waitress.. . . your college graduation ceremony includes parallel parking an 18-wheeler.. . . you think ribs come from Europe.. . . your toothbrush is a hand-me-down.. . . the nearest liquor store is brewing in your basement.. . . your Friday nights consist of lots of Budwieser and a mechanical bull.. . . you have used a potato peeler to remove a corn.. . . the Marlboro man is your idol.. . . you see a sign that says â€œdip in roadâ€ and you stop to see what flavor it is.. . . you think a canopy goes under the bed instead of over it.. . . youâ€™ve ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour.. . . youâ€™ve ever fished from over a fence.. . . you have ever taken lawn furniture to a drive-in.. . . your state senator is willingly photographed with no shirt and a leather vest on a Harley, but refuses to take a Breathalyzer test.. . . you think virgin wool comes from ugly sheep.. . . you keep catfish in your aquarium.. . . you think truffles are a brand of potato chips.. . . youâ€™ve ever bought a used cap.. . . you know all the verses to the â€œHee Hawâ€ song.</blockquote>

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