Originally posted by alantan@Apr 19 2004, 10:25 AM
ok well..dr.glozz..
need to ask you something...
sweet talk...anf bla bla..really important/
i'm bad with it...i'm seriusly not good with it..
as for me...i'm not so a sweet boy..i'm those old fashioned boy which uses the old fashioned way to fall in love with the girl...
out of ten boy..i'm the worst in the 'court' business...
eveyone is doing so well//and i'm the only one that can wait 2-3 years for one girl..
good or bad?
and about fear....i shouldn't let the fear tp bother me rite..let it be there and must learn to get used with it?fear is just there though...
Hmm, sweet talking eh? I think I understand where you're coming from.
I think you've misunderstood the whole process of courting. When trying to court, you SHOULD NOT do the most common mistake, which is NOT BEING YOURSELF. In other words, sweet talk = salesman talk = Complimenting just for the sake of complimenting = Corny, will only work in short term = NOT BEING YOURSELF!
Therefore, I am seriously against the notion of sweet talking. However, I believe in the notion of having a good, meaningful and fun conversation. This means being yourself, but also means allowing yourself to make the person you're talking to, be as comfortable as possible with you. The best method for this is by using humour. However, it is quite difficult for me to explain to you communication methods via posts as it is quite hard to explain.
Therefore, I'll just put it like this. Just be yourself, but understand how to talk to people. It's about making them comfortable and like talking to you. Be yourself, and use humour. Be light and yet sincere and understanding, as well as polite. Be as open-minded as possible since communication involves the free and common exchange of thoughts and opinions, however, do not compromise on your principles.
It's quite simple really. As for fear, it's not about forgetting the fear or ignoring it, it's just putting the fear behind you, and just do what you need to do. Fear will always be there. It takes a man to accept his/her fear, and a bigger person to confront his/her fears.
Good luck man.